Tuesday, 12 February 2008

I think I'm back

Na wa o!

Blogsville has really changed since I've been away. Its been only about three odd months or so and the atmosphere has become confoundingly bizarre. Before i go into that though, I'd like to give a piece of mind to bloggers who didn't give me, er, peace of mind. They kept bugging me for updates and stalking my blog, making me feel positively important (admittedly, these bloggers were quite few and with astonishing oneness of mind all stopped checking up on me after two or three halfhearted tries) Anyway, they did a lot boost my morale throughout my hiatus.

I also want to comment on my absence. I guess I should explain what happened and give some convincing story about me prevailing against all odds and that sort of thing, but frankly I don't really care to do any explaining. It goes against my grain to return to the past. I mean, living in the present is tasking enough and thinking about the future is donwright daunting. Also my past is riddled with mistakes, halftruths, scandalous emotional liasions and dizzying amounts of alcohol and these really are not devils I'd like to call up at this moment.

Finally, (oh jeez, this is beginning to sound like a grammy acceptance speech)...
ok. there is no finally. I just said that to give the narrative a structure.

so i was saying i'd noticed changes in Blogsville since I came back on board. I must have been a sort of stabilising factor because without me around bloggers have gone haywire. new ones, old ones...

first of all afrobabe, besides, giving us an eyeful of humerus in "fuck-me-pumps" continues to plaster her perfectly sensible posts with dirty pictures. honestly these days I dont have to read Ubong Da anymore for imaginative thoughts

and atutu is having a crush on Norah Jones of all people! forget the fact he tried to couch it as a narrative emphasizing an appreciation of her musical talent, I know what he had going on in his mind. I'm not saying she's not fine or anything o! but happened to Brick & Lace, Beyonce...

carlang, unfortunately, has reached the end of the line as he almost has certainly lost mind. despite whatever he says he sincerely thinks afrobabe is Jennifer Lopez, bases his predictions on Nigeria's chances in the Nations' cup on happenings on animal channels on Cable TV and, worst of all, acts a sixth toe in what obviously was a carefully intended menage a trois.

ubong da doesnt seem to have had any sexual experience since december and that's one of the real tragedies in blogsville today.

freaksho's latest endeavour is to write a book, waith for this....with no words of his own! He's asked the whole world to send in some of their best poetry in the guise of getting the perfect valentine couplet. soon as he's complied them he plans to have them published so he can live on the illegal proceeds all his life while we, the real authors, langiush on the periphery of literary excellence. talk about valentine's day massacre! (that was somewhat melodramatic, wasn't it?)

and since supergirl has become a company secretary she's stopped putting up posts

fantasyqueen, on the other hand has been living the life of a queen, being patronised by other bloggers...wait o, what is this talk i'm hearing about fantasyqueen and carlang? warrahell! and these two people decieved us that they actually enjoyed blogging when they were only using this as a dating site...